Melody for Maladies
by MDLuffy
Summary: Collection of short stories. - Mostly Cloud X Tifa. Story 3 After Sex: There weren't much during the action... or after. Is this all we've become?
1. Wednesday Letters

**Melody for Maladies**

**One: Wednesday Letters**

She mails every Wednesday.

It began in Spring last year, when I moved here. A letter, without name or address will be sent every Wednesday to my house. The letters are always in white envelops, the address of my house written in neat, black ink.

"_50, Avenue 7, Nibelheim Village, 1330."_

I wondered if it was from an acquaintance of the previous owner who passed away in an accident.

Out of curiosity, I opened one, then another and another. For a year and a half, I've read every one of them.

"_It was your birthday yesterday. _

_Through my window, I could see the party at your porch. I wanted to go… _

_But I'm not good with words. I'll probably… no, definitely be the odd one out._

_You look good in blue._

_Can love without destiny be considered love?"_

After the first letter, I asked my Grandpa through a phone call.

"Grandpa, you used to be the mayor here right? Do you know about the previous owner of this house?"

"Yeah. Not close, but I've heard things about him. Why do you ask?"

"Just curious. He kept the house in good condition."

"Tsk. He was a problematic child."

"How so?"

"He was the bad influence in the town. Always caused trouble around town. A wild one."

"I see. So how did he die?"

"Speeding. That kid never learns."

When I put down the phone, I felt a little less sorry for the girl. She loved the wrong man. I wonder if she knew he had already gone back to the planet? These letters can't reach him anymore… And she really shouldn't have confessed by mailing him her diary entries. It's one of the worst ways to confess. Given his character, he would've burnt them.

"_It was hard, but I managed to get into the same high school as you._

_It's hard._

_I have to work, or my family can't afford my schooling._

_You look great in uniform._

_So it's all worth it._

_Sometimes I wish you could look at my direction more."_

Deep in my heart, I felt sorry for the girl. But there was no way I could contact her, tell her about the previous owner. So all I could do was continue reading.

"_Recently, you've been listening to "Can't help fallin' in love"._

_I can hear it faintly from my room._

_Did you know it is describing the exact feeling I have?_

'_Like a river flows surely to the sea  
Darling so it goes  
Some things are meant to be  
Take my hand, take my whole life too  
For I can't help falling in love with you'_

_I bought the CD."_

I listened to the song. A once popular piece from about a few decades ago.

"_Graduation night._

_I heard you have someone you like._

_Do you even know my name?"_

Idiot. You should have confessed.

"_I don't have enough money to get into college with you._

_Now I won't be able to even make eye contact with you._

_You will do well in college._

_I know."_

xXx

"_I heard you have a lover now._

_It hurts._

_But I'll be fine if you're happy."_

xXx

"_I've been feeling a little sick lately._

_But my mother needs the money for chemotherapy._

_I'm on the verge of breaking._

_But remembering your smile makes everything better._

_I'm glad you are happy now."_

xXx

"_Life is tiring._

_Mother left._

_You left._

_Geostigma arrived._

_I don't think I have much time left."_

xXx

"_I heard you got married in Midgar._

_How beautiful you should look in a wedding dress._

_Yes, you were definitely enthralling._

_I'm glad I didn't confess._

_Geostigma is eating me alive."_

xXx

"Grandpa, are you sure the previous owner died in an accident and not Geostigma?"

"I'm not sure, probably. Reckless youth… Life is nothing to them."

"Don't say that of him. I think… he was more than what you thought of him."

The letters were written by the owner of this house. Did he think 'she' will visit?

xXx

"_Recently, the colours of the world are slowly fading._

_I've been retrenched._

_But it didn't matter._

_Not to a dead man like me._

_My eyes can't differentiate red from green._

_But I can see blue._

_The blue dress you wore for your fifteenth birthday is still clear in my dreams._

_Maybe I'll paint a picture of you in blue._

_Before blue leaves me."_

_xXx_

"_I was right._

_Blue eventually left._

_But I labelled the paints._

_So I can continue painting._

_Before my eyesight leaves."_

_xXx_

"_You are back._

_Only to recuperate._

_The accident took your eyes from you._

_I heard a healthy cornea can bring your sight back._

_I remember how you loved the flowers in your garden._

_If you can't see them._

_Or the sun in the morning._

_Or the stars at night._

_Or your newborn child's face._

_Or your husband's features._

_How devastated must you feel._

_I have no need for my cornea._

_The painting is almost done._

_I kept it locked in the attic._

_I've signed the document from the hospital._

_Left mother's house to the mayor._

_Now,_

_I just have to get into an accident, so light can engulf you again._

_I love you, Tifa Lockhart._

_-Cloud Strife"_

xXx

The next letter never arrived. Subsequent Wednesdays, I found myself re-reading the letters.

My last Wednesday here before I returned to Midgar, I walked to the attic, and I knew the passcode for the lock. 4 letters, not "love", but "Tifa."

In there, neatly kept in a corner, protected from dust with a white cloth, was the most beautiful painting I've ever seen. I wonder if she looked like this decades ago?

Long, ebony hair that shimmered at night, almond wine eyes with thick lashes. Yes, she looks good in blue. The birthday hat looked like a crown, and the way her lips curved, she looked almost angelic.

Was this how you always looked at her?

I brought the phone to my ears and dialled a number.

"Hey darling."

"Hi Mom. How are your eyes?"

"Hmmm? They're fine."

"Are you happy?"

"Marlene, are you alright? You're acting strange. Is it the Nibelheim essay too taxing? Told you to choose another University…"

"Mom, are you happy?"

"Of course I am. Why do you ask?"

"Please, always be happy, Mom."

"Sweetie, is something wrong?"

"No. It's nothing."

"Hmmmmn. If you say so."

"Mom, I bought a painting for you. I'll bring it back to you next week."

"Awww, thank you, sweetie."

"Please treasure it."

"Of course I will!"

With a soft click, I ended the call.

_Mr Strife, can you hear me? She's happy._

Thank you.


	2. Silence

**Melody for Maladies**

**Two: Silence**

"That's all there is to her will. Sir, Miss, if you would excuse me."

I held his wrinkled hands in mind and pressed them to my lips. At seventy, he still preferred his silence. He gave me a reassuring nod and brought the key left by the lawyer to his room. I know he won't be out for a while. I held the document in my hands and read it again. There were only two sentences.

"_I left a box of letters in my safe for you. This is the key."_

He didn't emerge from his room until dinner the next day. I wondered if he cried in bed? But all the comfort I could give was a cup of red tea, no sugar, brewed the way she taught me so many years ago. He pressed the cup to his lips, but didn't drink. His grey eyelashes fluttered slightly and I could only wonder what was crossing his mind. When he finally set down the cup, it was untouched and cold.

He ruffled my hair, his coarse fingers softly stroked my brow. I know he was offering the comfort he could give to me. There was nothing much he could do when the news probably broke him more. But I'm glad he recognized the tearing pain I feel for her death. He didn't eat.

Late that night, I served a bowl of hot soup to his room. I couldn't watch him damage his frail body like this. Not after the trauma of her leaving us. He opened the door after two knocks, his body, though weakened by age, was still that of a warrior. But I knew his gesture was more than just that. He didn't want to talk. Not even the simple two words, "Come in."

His smile didn't reach his eyes, his darkened blue eyes. I struggled to remember the way those eyes shone when I was younger. Or the way she spoke about them. _"Azure eyes, that when he fought, lights up in an almost neon tint of turquoise."_ But she stopped after two years of marriage. No more talks about him, the way she idolized him, or the way he was always away. It was resignation. Reality just sinks in after time._ "I loved those eyes." _I can still hear her voice, soft and clear, at times husky from the tears she never showed me. I can't remember the way she looked when I was young. Not anymore.

Is it the same for him? Will his old age take a toll on his memories?

"I brought some soup for you."

He looked a little troubled. Perhaps he didn't want to eat. But I took advantage of his silence and walked through the door, closing it behind me as I set the bowl on a wooden side table.

"Did you read her letters?"

He shook his head and sat on the bed, patting the space beside him. I complied and sat beside him, resting my head on his arm. It had been so long since we've touched.

"They're all blank."

I looked up into his eyes, they were closed.

"Blank?"

"Yeah. She didn't leave any last words for me."

There was no emotion in his voice.

"Do you know why?"

"I thought about it last night." He paused, tone diminishing. "I think it's her way of punishing me."

"Why?"

He stroked the back of my head softly and sighed.

"Because I've always been silent around her."

I looked down at the floorboard and tried not to look at him, or the weakness that must have surfaced with that revelation.

"She's not that kind of person."

I could feel him nod lightly.

"Even before she… we've talked very little."

Death was still a sensitive issue. I waited, patiently for him to continue.

"I guess she just gave up."

"She loved you." Confidence was oozing from my words. If there was anything I knew about her, it was her love. Her love for us, him, and everything. "She was an optimistic woman."

"I've made her lose her voice with me."

"Cloud…" I whispered. How long had it been since I called his name? Since when did everything turn out this way? Since when had silence dictate our every moment? "She wouldn't want you to think that way."

He shifted a little in his seat and I think back about the things she'd say to me.

"She once said, she'd make sure you had hot meals after your delivery trips, and a hot bath."

"I used to be gone for so long."

"Sometimes, she felt a little disappointed when you just plop into bed."

He chuckled softly.

"But she'd tell me how happy she feels when you always manage to return."

"I know… She never got over the hurt when I left to die."

I held his hands tight in mine and shook my head.

"No… She was worried you'd think that this isn't your home."

"Almost fifty years of marriage, and I've never treated her right."

"She felt the happiest with you, Cloud."

"I've always been silent."

"Tifa… Tifa said she learnt to be silent from you."

He stopped replying.

"She said you have so much emotion beneath the silence that she learnt to understand them… in her own silence."

He looked away, and I could almost see the bottled tears running down his cheeks.

"I think… those blank letters are her way of expressing her emotions, Cloud. Her happiness with you, loneliness when you were away… her love. Everything."

I brought his trembling hands to my lips and kissed them softly. "Surely her feelings are the same as yours. You can understand them without words right?"


	3. After Sex

**Melody for Maladies**

**Three: After Sex**

He didn't do much talking during the action, just some facial expressions, seemingly in pleasure, so much that his forehead crinkle and his eyes closed tight.

But I had wanted him to look at me.

How do normal couples do it? Do they stroke their spouse's face, kiss their neck while the frictional pleasure engulf them into the blinding oblivion of pleasure? Surely they'd call each other's name, hold hands and reach the peak together. Not like us, eyes closed, pure silence where the female softly cry the name of the male.

Do not be mistaken, our sex life is healthy. Three or more times a week. Bizarre, I know, but it happens. He would come home from delivery. At times when he's home from a trip of several days, he would climb into bed, under our covers, and kiss me softly, look into my eyes, undress me and finish it.

I wonder if it was his male libido needs, or him feeling neglected, but I'm not complaining. Love makes the mundane job enjoyable.

We've passed the phase of teenage love, when hearts race, faces flush and jealousy seemed romantic. Like the slow fermentation of fruit juice into wine, our relationship is changing into something else. Maybe it's a female thing, but insecurity surfaces at every juncture of the relationship between Cloud and I. Will I not be as appealing to him anymore? Will he not see me as what he did during our Avalanche days? At 29, I could vouch, with the eyes that projected lust shining my way, that I have yet to wither.

"There's a festival celebration at the children's school. Will you come?"

"It depends…"

Through the billowing steam from my mug, I inhaled the aroma of the coffee and waited for him to continue. The conversations between us had diluted from emotional chats about childhood promises, memories, Sephiroth, to Marlene and Denzel's schooling, phone bills and map routes for his deliveries.

When he didn't continue, I laid down the mug and sighed. "Find some time. It's not good for young psyches when they feel less privileged than the other kids."

"When is it?"

"Next week, Saturday."

It was his turn to sigh. "Weekends are the peak for deliveries…"

A careful sip of the coffee and I left the dining table. Before I walked out, he muttered, so softly I barely made out what he said. "I'll try."

'_Try.'_ Maybe it was that simple, to try.

I hope he'd let me _try_.

Later that night, Cloud slept beside me, wordless. I wonder when did this tension slip in between us, tearing our harmony into solitude. We had always been together, but what was that suffocating loneliness? Did he feel the same way?

xXx

"Thank you, Cloud."

"What for?"

"For coming…"

Denzel had always been closer to Cloud. I knew it wasn't enough when I turned up for parent-teacher meetings, or school activities. He wanted to be closer to his hero. I'm glad Cloud went.

He smiled and ruffled the little boy's hair.

This family business… I want to _try_ it out too. I stepped forward and linked arms with Cloud, joining him in ruffling Denzel's hair. The young man blushed and smiled at us. I know what he's thinking: **Family warmth.**

"I'm glad you came, Cloud!" Marlene squeaked. "Tifa always wanted you to come!"

I flushed a pinkish tint and hugged the little girl. "Was it fun?"

"Sure is!" She jumped happily, landing beside Denzel and hugging him from behind. "Denzel's here, Tifa's here and Cloud's here too!"

The children of the planet are facing an anathema left behind by the series of catastrophe: Meteor, sector 7, Geostigma, Deepground… I hugged the two kids tight in my arms and whispered a soft promise to always be with them.

In our world, safety and peace comes with immense price.

I turned over to Cloud, I wonder if he could recognize the slight pleading in my eyes.

'_Can we cherish all these… more than now?'_

xXx

When I finished tucking Marlene and Denzel to bed, Cloud was waiting for me in the bedroom. His hair was still damp from the shower, but his eyes were burning sapphire.

He was wearing nothing but a pair of checkered boxers, laying on the bed, arms crossed beneath his head. We had sex twice this week, so this was third.

I laid down beside him and shifted to fit into the crook of his neck.

"I'm glad you went."

"Did you suppose I wouldn't go?"

"You didn't sound like you were…"

He turned and moved his hands from under his head to stroke my cheek. "I…" He searched for the words but found nothing.

I signed and kissed him softly on his lips. This time, it was my turn to try. "You're not good with words, I know." I muttered against him and I could feel his body relax under my touch. "We… were getting used to each other…"

He opened his eyes and looked at me.

"Used to drink coffee together, sleep together, talk through silence, sex…" I softened at the last word. "We've gotten so used to these… how do I say this…"

He kissed my forehead lightly and continued where I left off. "So familiar, we became unfamiliar."

We've known about this, we just didn't confront it. "Yeah…"

He breathed in deeply, but I cut off whatever he wanted to say. "I want to know you again."

I rolled on top of him and touched his muscular chest. "The touch of your skin…"

"The feel of your lips…" A soft kiss against his lips.

"Your taste…" A slide of tongue against his lips, parting them. We meandered in each other's mouths, exploring as though it was the first time we're touching. He sighed softly into me and straddled me onto him, holding my hips. It's been so long since we've so meticulously …feel… each other.

The next few moments, we found ourselves fondling, teasing, caressing places we've touched so many times, as though it was our first. His hand on my breast, light as a breeze, my lips on his ear, tickling like a soft feather on his skin. It felt like hours, we explored the light traces of wrinkle on our faces, the cuts on our fingers from years of fighting, chipped nails to prevent injuries, scars left from our foes… everything there was to know about each other.

When he finally rocked into me, I nearly exploded.

The way his breath hitched and moans escaped from his usual silent routine, I knew he felt good, better than ever. It was simple sex, but it was a different experience. He was staring into my eyes, his eyes wet from unshed tears of joy and bliss. Mine was flowing down reddened cheeks between ragged breaths. His name was a torn cry when we came, together, filling me up, burning within me… our passion.

After sex, he rolled me into his arms, and softly mumbled the three little words he would always reword.

**_"I love you."_**


End file.
